Children’s wellbeing in the UK is in crisis. Young people here report the lowest life satisfaction in Europe, and the latest PISA data (2022) ranks the UK 70th out of 73 countries for young people's wellbeing. These aren’t just statistics—they’re a national wake-up call.

Anxiety, depression, and stress-related issues are on the rise among our children, and it’s no wonder. They are growing up in a world of relentless pressure—academic demands, social media scrutiny, and an uncertain future. They are struggling. And as mums, we feel that struggle deeply.

The Emotional Burden on Mums

We are raising children in an age of overwhelming advice. Every expert, every article, every well-meaning social media post tells us what we should be doing. Be firm but gentle. Set boundaries but be flexible. Prioritise their mental health but don’t be too soft. The conflicting messages are exhausting.

And at the heart of it all, we carry the weight of an unspoken fear: What if I get it wrong? What if my mistakes cost my child their happiness?

This pressure is crushing. It creates a cycle of self-doubt, guilt, and burnout. We try harder, read more, do more—but often at the expense of our own mental and emotional wellbeing. And when we are running on empty, it shows.

When Mums Struggle, Kids Struggle

I’ve seen this in my own life. The more I prioritised my own wellbeing—mentally, emotionally, and physically—the better equipped I was to support my children. The more I looked after me, the more present, patient, and resilient I became.

It took me a long time to realise this, but here’s the truth: Our children don’t need perfect mums. They need mums who are well.

What Can We Do?  

1. Start with Self-Compassion

The way we speak to ourselves matters. Self-criticism fuels stress and exhaustion. Instead, we need to cultivate self-compassion—treating ourselves with the same kindness we would offer a friend.  When we are kinder to ourselves, we model to our children how to handle failure, stress, and emotions with self-acceptance rather than self-judgment.

2. Prioritise Self-Care Without Guilt

Self-care is not selfish. It’s not an indulgence. It’s essential. When we take time to recharge, we become better parents. Whether it’s a walk, a bath, journaling, or just five deep breaths—small acts of self-care help build resilience.

3. Set Boundaries That Protect Your Energy

We teach our children how to set boundaries by demonstrating them ourselves. Saying no when we need to. Protecting our time. Limiting exposure to things that drain us. When we respect our own needs, we show our children how to respect theirs.

4. Regulate Yourself First

Children learn how to manage their emotions by watching how we manage ours. When we respond rather than react, when we stay calm even in chaos, we teach them emotional resilience. It’s not about never getting frustrated—it’s about showing them how to handle frustration with self-awareness.

5. Be Fully Present

Our kids don’t need more from us. They need us. Fully present. Not distracted. Not worrying about the next thing. Just here.  That doesn’t mean we have to be available 24/7. It means that when we are with them, we are truly with them.

It Starts with Us

The wellbeing crisis among children is real. But if we want to help them, we have to start with ourselves.

By prioritising our own mental and emotional health, we don’t just become better mums—we create an environment where our children feel safe, supported, and emotionally secure.

We don’t have to have all the answers. We just have to be the adults in the room when our kids need us most. And that starts with being well for them.

Taking care of yourself is not a luxury, it’s a necessity—for you and for your kids. 💛