Sometimes things don’t go quite as planned. And often, these moments present opportunities for self-kindness.

One day last week, I had planned to head north up the coast to a favourite walking spot. But after heavy rain the previous day, floodwater on the country route made me reassess. While other cars were attempting to drive through deep water, I wasn’t sure what risk it posed to my car or what lay ahead. Out of kindness to both myself and the car, I turned back.

Instead, I headed into Scarborough to check the cliff path by the north bay, somewhere I hadn’t been for months. A backup, drier option was a walk along the seafront. To my surprise, the steps up to the cliff top weren’t too muddy, and the path along the cliffs was far more accessible than I expected after the rain. I felt pleased to be back on the cliffs, where I love to walk, and to avoid the crowded weekend seafront.

It was a sunny afternoon but bracingly cold at four degrees. The sea was lively, with big waves crashing against the rocks and shore, and groups of gulls alternated between sitting on the water and taking flight to avoid the waves. I was exhilarated. I also noticed the contrasts in the landscape: on one side, dramatic cliffs and the pounding sea; on the other, gentle countryside with sheep grazing peacefully. I loved the interplay between these two worlds.

I paid attention to my inner responses as the day’s plans shifted. Early in the day, I felt some disappointment at needing to turn around and a little conflict about whether it was the “right” choice. At the same time, I felt gratitude for prioritising safety for both myself and the car. That felt like an act of self-kindness. The change of plans actually led to an unexpected gift: rediscovering a beautiful walk close to home. I reminded myself to look for positives in changing plans, while allowing any feelings of frustration or loss.

This week’s self-kindness invitation is to notice any “silver lining” moments in your own week: instances where something not going to plan resulted in an unexpected gift. Look out for ways to express self-kindness as plans change.